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Leader's Spotlight

Beth Davis: Self-Care for Leaders

By Lindsey Parsons

After years of helping missionaries in crisis, Beth Davis has found that the most common issue among women is a lack of self care, leading to burnout. In a recent interview, Beth said, “Ministers are so trained to help other people—to ‘love God and love others’—that ‘loving others as yourself’ gets lost.”

Beth is the director of CaringConnection, a highly-skilled team of missionaries who ministers to other new, veteran, and retirement-age missionaries. The team’s goal is to “help other missionaries develop their full potential for productive, long-term missions ministry.” They accomplish this through preventative teaching, counseling, crisis intervention, medical consulting, relationship networking, and guidance through all of a missionary’s life stages.

Beth has observed that women who are trapped in an unhealthy ministry lifestyle may show signs of burnout: anger, bitterness, loneliness, guilt that they’re not doing enough, deteriorating relationships, and difficulty getting along with several other people. They also become depressed and void of energy for prayer and Bible study. This is especially common among single women in ministry, because they take on a larger load: orphanages, Bible schools, child care, etc. As a former single woman missionary, Beth asserts, “If you don’t care for yourself, you won’t make it.”

When Beth probes deeper into the lives of struggling women, she always finds they have been neglecting self-care in at least one of four areas: exercise, diet, sleep, or healthy relationships.

1. Regular exercise. “I’m a great promoter of exercising. It helps us serve God better!” says Beth. She recommends exercising six days per week to improve attitude, energy, and brain function. Six days a week isn’t daunting when doing a variety of enjoyable activities, such as taking a walk after dinner, following a 15-minute aerobics tape, or going on a prayer hike.

2. A healthy diet. Avoid starchy foods, added sugars, artificial preservatives, and oversized portions; drink lots of water. “You will see how steady your energy levels are, and how much more you can focus on prayer when you skip the unhealthy foods,” says Beth. And to wake-up alert for morning devotions, plan on avoiding sweets and starches the night before.

3. More sleep than the average American. “The average person needs eight or more hours of sleep, but our busy society doesn’t allow for this,” says Beth. She advises people to cut out some of their usual evening activities—even the “important” things.

4. Healthy relationships. “Healthy relationships take time,” says Beth, “and if the first three things aren’t in order, you’ll have nothing to give.” She has seen social isolation as a common problem among women in ministry—both in America and on the mission field. “Often, missionaries are surrounded by foreigners, and have no one to really bond with. And in America, women in ministry might be surrounded by plenty of people, but do not have enough intimate relationships. In both cases, social isolation will burn them out quickly.” Beth’s advice to these women is simple: “Be intentional about forming relationships—don’t let self-care get lost in God’s work.”

Beth’s practical solutions often surprise women who think their problems are solely spiritual. According to Beth, “The solution doesn’t sound spiritual, but it is! We are all interconnected—spirit, mind, and body. If you’re exercising and well rested, you’ll have more alertness in your devotional life. It will even improve your ability to pray.”

Coming from a veteran missionary who now lives week-to-week out of a suitcase, Beth’s advice is certainly tried and true. She and her husband are first responders to countless crises around the world, and must be at their best to meet enormous demands. “We prevent burnout by following our own sermons!” says Beth. “We look out for each other and schedule recovery for ourselves after our trips. We keep in contact with close friends in Springfield who listen and don’t expect a lot of us. We rest, play (so important!), enjoy good food, friends, and our home church. We plan leisure time, especially after a strenuous trip.” She adds, “It won’t happen unless we schedule it for ourselves. We have to be proactive and intentional, remembering that Jesus is the one who saves people—not us!”

If you are a woman in ministry who feels the symptoms of burnout, take some time to evaluate your lifestyle. Are you exercising regularly? Do you have a healthy diet? Are you setting aside enough time for sleep? Have you been nurturing healthy and intimate relationships? Perhaps it is time to release some of your “to do” list, and the guilt as well. Remember, you are just as valuable as the needy people you are ministering to. Consider Beth’s advice: “Take care of yourself. Put the oxygen mask on yourself first, and then you will be able to help the person next to you.”

Beth is the director of CaringConnection, and serves with her husband Nathan Davis, a former Air Force psychologist. They have three adult children: Angie, Jason, and Vincent, and three grandchildren. Beth and Nathan are based in Springfield, Missouri, although Beth says, “Every place I go, I’d love to stay. It’s amazing to see what God is doing through other people around the world.”

Visit www.caringconnection.net to learn more about CaringConnection and to support this ministry.

LINDSEY PARSONS lives in Springfield, Missouri, with her husband Bryan. She has led a variety of ministries for evangelism, discipleship, and addiction recovery. After earning a Christian Counseling degree from Central Bible College, she became the Editorial Assistant to the Leadership Development Coordinator of Assemblies of God National Women’s Ministries. Lindsey enjoys the outdoors, journaling, guitar, and her pet turtle “Piddles.”

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